I don’t play a lot of videogames. I used to, and nothing against people who play a whole ton, but I just don’t have the time nor the temper for it. I own a Wii and am the very definition of a casual gamer; yes, when I die, I usually throw the controller down and do something else. I don’t like puzzles or having to hone skills for days, months, years; I detest grinding, new game plus-ing, completion scores, and most definitely, single player.

Now, there’s something else I hate, and that’s a gimmick, which is basically what the Wii is when you really think about it. As a testament to my bony girl arms, I’ve grown sore and tired from having to waggle the batteries out of my Wiimote during Madworld or No More Heroes, muscles torn asunder from hours upon hours of virtual jacking-it. I don’t think motion control is where it needs to be at the moment, and I’ve yet to be blown away by anything Nintendo has presented concerning said “genre-defining” control mechanism.

But to the point: New Super Mario Bros. Wii is the first time I can think of where Nintendo has admitted its faults. No, it doesn’t do it outright, but instead with a subtle banishment of all things unnecessary and poorly-implemented. No waggle. No frustrating minigames. No hassle. To be truthful, there’s nothing particularly new about New Super Mario Bros. Wii other than it is, in fact, a new, and this may be Nintendo’s biggest weakness anyway: making the same damn thing repeatedly, churning out the hackneyed franchises with technological updates steadily growing further and further apart. And I won’t defend this practice, other than that it’s a swell way to make money, but at least this time they’ve approached it with a fan’s sensibility rather than lacquering on a thick coat of unnecessary bullshit and kicking it out on the streets. So unlike, say, Mario Kart Double Dash, which was submitted to the exact same lacquering I just mentioned, New Super Mario Bros. Wii is old Super Mario Bros., which, as the game will make you remember, was absolutely brilliant.

Look at this. Remember being all happy the first time you played Super Mario Bros., the first time you saw a two-player option and thought to yourself that you and Luigi could now rock the world together, only to be sorely disappointed that you had to take turns? Yeah, this game doesn’t do that. Four at a time, and that’s not all: what you think may be some cheap co-op crap quickly turns into the harshest festival of shit-talking mayhem you’ve ever witnessed, once you realize that not only can you not pass through each other, but that your friends are the most fearsome obstacles blocking your way to the fields of magic mushrooms and cash money.

This game is fun. Everything good from the Mario franchise is present here, and there’s a refreshing absence of crap characters such as Waluigi (was Wuigi too hard to pronounce?), Toadette, or, with a groan, Funky Kong. Yes, it’s essentially Super Mario World with a slightly better physics engine, multiplayer, enhanced graphics, cooler items, and nifty controls. But isn’t that what you’ve always wanted?

Oh, and the old music is back. A+.

I was shown this video of Les Savy Fav at Austin’s Fun Fun Fun Fest, which completely made me regret not wizarding my way out of work and attending the thing. With folks like Fuck Buttons, Health, Shonen Knife, The GZA, ohmigod, et cetera, full lineup here, next year, next year.

And to further harsh my mellow, I was shown this video, which made me want to purchase an undersized collegiate cardigan, watch Wendy Williams, study business, mortgage a dream home, enter politics, and then pass legislation to expunge weed culture from this planet, but said feeling quickly passed when I realized not only that the video was seven years old, but also that I was pretty high. Observe the fact that Fieldy sometimes forgets to rhyme, and that he apparently thinks dressing like a little girl is hip, the latter demonstrating that at least two out of four of the original Korn troupe have tremendous sexual problems.

Back to the festival, it’s only eight hours away (harsh, but it’s the best around), located in a pretty cool city, and seems to attract a nice lineup. I’ve also been told that the park’s topography is pretty varied, offering some hills and inclines with which one can have fun. If I slid down a rainslick hill while Fuck Buttons bled my ears, I would be so happy.

Though this is my first contribution to the TW Hookup blog, there is something far more important to discuss than myself. Fly Eyes.

Popularized by Scottish electro/house/80’s-feelgood musician Calvin Harris, Fly Eyes are a set of enigmatic spectacles completely bedazzled lens-to-lens in Hobby Lobby rhinestones. Upon sighting a pair, you’ll probably think of Kanye and his familiar Shutter Shades, and upon putting the glasses on, you’ll be absolutely blind. Like Flava Flav’s neck-cracking wall clock piece or the aforementioned Shutter Shades, Fly Eyes are pure fashion, no function.

Now you may be wondering what the purpose of Fly Eyes is. Some who put them on are confounded and irritated that someone could make such a useless and limiting accessory, while others are entranced by their silvery array of Elmersed-on jewels. Is Harris making a commentary on avant-garde fashion that forsakes functionality for confused media publicity and shameless self-promotion? Or is Harris totally lost on himself, existing in the nebulous cloud of hipster irony that somehow criticises and fetishizes its own ridiculousness? Describing this state of mind and style is difficult, but maybe Harris himself can help us out with this most insightful instructional video.

So Harris seems to treat the Fly Eyes with a fairly substantial level of humor, far from the likes of, let’s say, Kanye, who rocks his Shutter Shades amidst the serious, almost malicious, cityscape of the Stronger vid. And as for Flava and his pendulous timepiece, well, as a utterly goofy hypeman, anything he does needs no commentary.

I’ve no clue what to really think about Fly Eyes other than that they seem to fit well with Harris’s brand of over-the-top fashion disco, and to anyone familiar with his tunes, you’ll most likely agree. His first record, I Created Disco, is so utterly corny that it seems impossible to believe he put any amount of seriousness into the thing, even given the fact that we live in a world where Steven Seagal’s “Talk to my Ass” was mixed and cut to a record.  For people, such as myself, who are attracted to shiny objects, Fly Eyes are quite interesting to look at in their own right, which explains why I made a pair for myself. A few hours later and reeking of superglue and spraypaint, I too was blind to everything around me, and quite fashionably so.

Name: Joshua Nee

Band(s): Man Plus Building, We Landed on the Moon!, & Baby Boy

Instruments: Drums, Bass

Joshua Nee with the Man Plus Building folks.

TW: What are some of your favorite local bands?

JN: Thou & Caddywhompus

TW: What is your favorite song to play live?

JN: I don’t really have favorite songs, but I do have favorite moments that happen during each of my band’s set. Sometimes certain parts just give me the chills, like “Ah, that’s EXACTLY how that’s supposed to sound!� I suppose it’s those moments that tell me we did something right.

TW: What’s one talent you have besides playing music?

JN: I’d like to think I rule at basketball. I can also eat pizza for 3 weeks consecutively on tour. I’d call that talent.

TW: If you could only read one book, listen to one album, and watch one movie for the rest of your live, which ones would you choose?

JN: Yipes! Toughie… Let’s see. The book would be “Breakfast of Champions� by Vonnegut (or “To Kill A Mockingbird�). The album would be… “Grace� by Jeff Buckley? Maybe Hall and Oates Greatest Hits? “The Argument� by Fugazi? This is an impossible question. My movie is a no-brainer, though: Spice World.

TW: If you could open for any band, which one would it be?

JN: I’ve been fortunate so far to have opened for a lot of bands that really love, like Mono, HEALTH, GIRLTALK, Ghastly City Sleep, Pygmy Lush, and Colour Revolt. I really want to open for GWAR. I bet they like to party.

TW: What’s one song that you could never get tired of?

JN: Not gonna lie, I loved that “Toxic� song from ol’ B. Spears.

TW: What is your first memory involving music?

JN: Playing violin in 4^th grade. My mom always reminds me that she was pregnant with me when she saw Michael Jackson. I don’t really remember that though, so whatevs.

TW: What is the best concert you’ve ever been to?

JN: Man, I feel like I’ve said “THAT WAS THE BEST SHOW I’VE EVER SEEN!� a lot recently. Grizzly Bear, These Arms are Snakes, Mono, Matt&Kim, Cursive, and Lions all stand out to me (huge thanks to my boy Aaron Scruggs for most of those!). Every one is special and unique in it’s own way.

TW: What is your favorite song to dance to?

JN: Whatever’s on when I’m drunk.

TW: If you could see any band, present or past, which band would you see?

JN: Actually, I’m going to go with the future! Can’t wait till Gwen Stafani and Gavin Whatshisname’s kids form a band. Lookout y’all! They’re gonna be HUGE.

Bonus Question:

TW: Does your band have any albums? If so, where can people find one

JN: We Landed on the Moon will be releasing our third album pretty soon. I think the other two are at the Compact Disc Store and on iTunes. Man Plus Building has two albums available at the Compact Disc Store and ManPlusBuilding.com.

You can check them out here or you can see a few of them in Wednesday’s issue.

Enjoy!

Name: John Lambremont

Band(s): We Landed on the Moon!

Instruments: Guitar, Keyboards

TW: What are some of your favorite local bands?

JL: All the local bands here are terrible. And I mean every single one of them. I hate Man + Building, Thou, the Promise Breakers… Not a lick of talent or sense among the lot of them. I’d advise them to start sounding more like Nickelback if they ever want me to listen to them.

TW: What is your favorite song to play live?

JL: I’d guess my favorite song to play by Live would be that song where he’s talking about hearing the dolphins cry. Either that or that one where he keeps talking about new moms and old moms after lightning crashes. I can’t remember the name of that song.

TW: What’s one talent you have besides playing music?

JL: I can put together any jigsaw puzzle in under thirteen minutes. It doesn’t matter how many pieces.

TW: If you could only read one book, listen to one album, and watch one movie for the rest of your live, which ones would you choose?

JL: What type of sadistic bastard would make me do something like that? I can’t imagine

having to listen to the same album or watch the same movie any more than I can imagine having pizza for every meal. The last record I wore out on my cd player was The Hold Steady’s Boys And Girls in America. But now I rarely listen to it, even though I still love it. I’ve probably watched the movie Ghostbusters a hundred times. But, I don’t think I’d pick anything. I’d hate to start hating a favorite anything from overexposure.

TW: If you could open for any band, which one would it be?

JL: Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band.

TW: What’s one song that you could never get tired of?

JL: I think the songs that are the most timeless are the ones that you link with good times. For instance, the Entertainer. If I hear that song, it means I’m about to get a frosty ice cream treat. Or whatever song they have playing on repeat in the Chinese takeout. Pavlovian response at its best. Maybe the Beatles version of Twist and Shout.

TW: What is your first memory involving music?

JL: I remember trying to strum a really small acoustic guitar while my Dad was playing this old Yamaha classical. In my head, what I was playing sounded like Dancing Days by Led Zeppelin (not that I knew it was the name of the song at the time or who sung it). So I was sitting there getting super into it and thinking I was doing really good when my Dad told me to knock it off and go to my room.

TW: What is the best concert you’ve ever been to?

JL: The best concert was probably Radiohead at UNO a few years back for their Hail to the Thief tour. Thom was in a great mood and danced this crazy little dance. He looked like a leprechaun. I had been waiting to see them for so long, and when I finally did it was just a total release. Exhilarating.

TW: What is your favorite song to dance to?

JL: Modern, lyrical or tap?

TW: If you could see any band, present or past, which band would you see?

JL: Does everyone say the Beatles? Because if they do, I’d just tell them to get Beatles Rock Band because it’s the exact same thing. Seriously. But really, I think I’d want to see the Who circa 1970. Loud rock music. Smashing guitars. Blown up drum kits.

BONUS QUESTION:

TW: Does your band have any albums? If so, where can people find one?

JL: Yes. We have two albums. Our self-titled LP and These Little Wars both of which can be found on Itunes, Amazon or at the Compact Disc Store. Or even better come to a show. Shake your booty. And come talk to us.

FINAL THOUGHT:
TW: Where are you playing next?

JL: We’re playing a number of festivals this year. We’ll be touring up to the CMJ Music Marathon in NYC at Kenny’s Castaways in October 23^rd (tonight) and all the way back down to play Voodoo Fest on Nov. 1^st. So tell your friends in other cities to come and say hello.

So, the Flaming Lips is now planning to record a cover version of Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon… read on here.

In other band news, the Lips just came out with this awesome-sounding (in my opinion) new album. Sure, it’s a bit different then the past few albums — a little more vintage soundin’ in the way of the likes of John Lennon, etc. (says lead man Wayne Coyne). Be sure to check it out and the awesomely weird album art.

The Lips will be gracing NOLA with their wonderfully fun stage antics on the last say of Voodoo Fest. Until then, you can check out a cool performance by the Lips here.

Check out Tiger Weekly’s Voodoo issue for an interview with Flaming Lips front man, Wayne Coyne.

In other music news, Pavement (yay) just announced some more reunion tour dates (yay) in addition to those already planned for NY’s Central Park next year. Too bad these dates are all in Austraila, England, or New Zealand (boo).

(Note: All of this info plus the cool graphic via Pitchfork.com)

What are you doing Wednesday? If the answer is nothing and if you are feeling like a drive, you should go to New Orleans either this Wednesday, Thursday, or Friday to see a few cool shows. Or just camp out there and see all three. Dan Deacon on Wednesday at Big Top ($5), Wavves on Thursday at Howlin’ Wolf ($10), and A Place to Bury Strangers on Friday at One Eyed Jacks ($10). Be there or be square.

So Chelsea’s Cafe has its liquor license back (again) after having it taken away by the ATC (again). Thus, Dr. Dog will be playing there tomorrow night as planned.

Read more about it here:
http://www.2theadvocate.com/news/62778972.html

It’s almost the end of the first decade of the 21st century — well sort of, since as of today, it is still September. But don’t tell that to Pitchfork.com, though. The online music magazine has already started with its “best of” lists, already naming everything from the top 500 songs of the 2000s to the top 50 music videos of the decade. Moreover, the site is sounding off with articles that aim to recap the decade in various genres, including (so far) pop, noise, and indie. Recently, the site recalled the top news stories of the decade, hitting on everything from Eminem’s Slim Shady army at the VMAs in 2000 to the more recent fight (of words) between Flaming Lips front man Wayne Coyne and Arcade Fire’s Win Butler. Currently, the people at Pitchfork are working on a list of the top 200 albums of the 2000s. Since it is not even October yet, I am sure there will be much, much more to come.

You can check it all out here: http://pitchfork.com/p2k/